She_PPHS1 's_VBZ the_AT One_PN1 The_AT winter_NNT1 after_II her_APPGE brother_NN1 killed_VVD himself_PPX1 ,_, Ally_NN1 got_VVD a_AT1 job_NN1 at_II a_AT1 writers_NN2 '_GE center_NN1 near_II her_APPGE parents_NN2 '_GE house_NN1 ,_, helping_VVG out_RP with_IW admin_NN1 in_II the_AT office_NN1 ._. 
It_PPH1 was_VBDZ n't_XX a_AT1 satisfactory_JJ job_NN1 ,_, only_JJ part_NN1 time_NNT1 and_CC not_XX well_RR paid_VVN ._. 
She_PPHS1 was_VBDZ twenty-two_MC ._. 
She_PPHS1 had_VHD just_RR finished_VVN her_APPGE degree_NN1 in_II English_JJ literature_NN1 and_CC should_VM have_VHI been_VBN building_VVG toward_II some_DD sort_NN1 of_IO career_NN1 ;_; she_PPHS1 had_VHD planned_VVN to_TO move_VVI to_II Manchester_NP1 ,_, where_CS she_PPHS1 had_VHD been_VBN at_II university_NN1 ._. 
But_CCB everything_PN1 like_II that_DD1 had_VHD had_VHN to_TO be_VBI put_VVN on_II hold_NN1 ,_, while_CS at_II home_NN1 her_APPGE family_NN1 melted_VVD down_RP into_II a_AT1 kind_NN1 of_IO madness_NN1 ._. 
It_PPH1 was_VBDZ a_AT1 relief_NN1 just_RR to_TO leave_VVI the_AT madness_NN1 behind_RL and_CC drive_VVI across_II the_AT moors_NN2 four_MC mornings_NNT2 a_AT1 week_NNT1 to_II the_AT center_NN1 ,_, several_DA2 miles_NNU2 away_RL ._. 
She_PPHS1 had_VHD the_AT use_NN1 of_IO a_AT1 car_NN1 ,_, because_CS for_IF the_AT moment_NN1 her_APPGE mum_NN1 was_VBDZ n't_XX going_VVG to_II work_NN1 ._. 
The_AT moors_NN2 that_DD1 winter_NNT1 were_VBDR often_RR under_II a_AT1 crust_NN1 of_IO snow_NN1 --_NN1 not_XX enough_RR to_TO blanket_VVI them_PPHO2 in_II white_JJ ,_, but_CCB a_AT1 mean_JJ ,_, dirty_JJ frosting_NN1 on_II the_AT hard_JJ earth_NN1 and_CC wilted_VVD shrubs_NN2 ._. 
Ally_NN1 did_VDD n't_XX mind_VVI the_AT bitter_JJ weather_NN1 ._. 
Her_APPGE guilt_NN1 at_II getting_VVG out_RP ,_, even_RR for_IF a_AT1 few_DA2 hours_NNT2 ,_, would_VM fall_VVI away_RL as_CSA she_PPHS1 drove_VVD ,_, leaving_VVG the_AT town_NN1 behind_RL ._. 
Sometimes_RT when_CS she_PPHS1 parked_VVD at_II the_AT center_NN1 ,_, crunching_VVG into_II the_AT gravelled_JJ space_NN1 between_II the_AT kitchen_NN1 and_CC the_AT high_JJ black_JJ garden_NN1 wall_NN1 ,_, where_CS the_AT stones_NN2 were_VBDR mossy_JJ and_CC ferns_NN2 grew_VVD in_II the_AT cracks_NN2 ,_, she_PPHS1 was_VBDZ really_RR all_RR21 right_RR22 for_IF a_AT1 moment_NN1 ._. 
I_PPIS1 'm_VBM really_RR all_RR21 right_RR22 ,_, she_PPHS1 would_VM think_VVI ,_, carefully_RR ,_, lightly_RR ,_, as_CSA she_PPHS1 pulled_VVD the_AT key_NN1 from_II the_AT ignition_NN1 ,_, trying_VVG not_XX to_TO examine_VVI the_AT sensation_NN1 too_RG closely_RR or_CC lose_VV0 it_PPH1 with_IW any_DD sudden_JJ movement_NN1 ,_, as_CS21 if_CS22 it_PPH1 were_VBDR a_AT1 thin-filmed_JJ shiny_JJ bubble_NN1 poised_VVN in_II her_APPGE chest_NN1 ._. 
The_AT center_NN1 was_VBDZ in_II a_AT1 big_JJ bleak_JJ house_NN1 built_VVN in_II the_AT early_JJ nineteenth_MD century_NNT1 ,_, isolated_VVN in_II a_AT1 dip_NN1 in_II the_AT middle_NN1 of_IO the_AT moors_NN2 ,_, beside_II a_AT1 river_NN1 ._. 
It_PPH1 had_VHD been_VBN modernized_VVN to_TO suit_VVI its_APPGE new_JJ function_NN1 ._. 
A_AT1 couple_NN1 of_IO outbuildings_NN2 ,_, along_RP from_II the_AT kitchen_NN1 ,_, had_VHD been_VBN converted_VVN into_II a_AT1 studio_NN1 for_IF writing_VVG workshops_NN2 and_CC an_AT1 office_NN1 ,_, homely_JJ with_IW the_AT comfortable_JJ ticking_NN1 of_IO computers_NN2 and_CC photocopier_NN1 and_CC fax_VV0 machine_NN1 ._. 
Fluorescent_JJ Post-it_PPH1 notes_VVZ were_VBDR stuck_VVN to_II the_AT office_NN1 shelves_NN2 ,_, reminding_VVG the_AT staff_NN of_IO the_AT things_NN2 that_CST needed_VVN doing_VDG ,_, the_AT set_NN1 procedures_NN2 for_IF each_DD1 group_NN1 of_IO students_NN2 that_CST came_VVD and_CC went_VVD ._. 
Ally_VV0 quickly_RR mastered_VVD these_DD2 ;_; she_PPHS1 was_VBDZ capable_JJ and_CC sensible_JJ ._. 
The_AT organizers_NN2 of_IO the_AT center_NN1 ,_, Kit_NN1 and_CC Sam_NP1 ,_, were_VBDR pleased_JJ to_TO have_VHI her_PPHO1 helping_VVG out_RP ._. 
Also_RR ,_, because_CS Ally_NN1 had_VHD always_RR loved_VVN reading_NN1 ,_, the_AT idea_NN1 was_VBDZ that_CST she_PPHS1 would_VM enjoy_VVI meeting_VVG the_AT writers_NN2 who_PNQS taught_VVD there_RL --_NN1 there_EX would_VM be_VBI something_PN1 in_II it_PPH1 for_IF her_PPHO1 ,_, too_RR ._. 
Ally_NN1 had_VHD got_VVN the_AT job_NN1 through_II the_AT woman_NN1 her_APPGE mum_NN1 had_VHD worked_VVN for_IF as_II a_AT1 secretary_NN1 ,_, when_CS she_PPHS1 was_VBDZ still_RR at_II work_NN1 ._. 
This_DD1 woman_NN1 was_VBDZ a_AT1 barrister_NN1 in_II employment_NN1 law_NN1 ,_, and_CC she_PPHS1 was_VBDZ on_II the_AT board_NN1 of_IO trustees_NN2 for_IF the_AT center_NN1 ._. 
In_II some_DD people_NN ,_, the_AT family_NN1 's_GE disaster_NN1 had_VHD produced_VVN this_DD1 phenomenon_NN1 --_NN1 a_AT1 crazy_JJ energy_NN1 of_IO organization_NN1 on_II their_APPGE behalf_NN1 ._. 
Ally_NN1 was_VBDZ grateful_JJ for_IF the_AT job_NN1 ,_, but_CCB it_PPH1 made_VVD her_APPGE mother_NN1 angry_JJ :_: "_" As_RR21 usual_RR22 ,_, she_PPHS1 comes_VVZ barging_VVG in_RP ,_, thinking_VVG she_PPHS1 knows_VVZ best_RRT ._. "_" 
Mum_NN1 was_VBDZ also_RR angry_JJ ,_, on_II the_AT other_JJ hand_NN1 ,_, at_II their_APPGE neighbors_NN2 in_II the_AT close_NN1 of_IO ex-council_JJ houses_NN2 ,_, some_DD of_IO whom_PNQO had_VHD been_VBN her_APPGE friends_NN2 for_IF years_NNT2 but_CCB now_RT crept_VVD in_RP and_CC out_RP trying_VVG to_TO avoid_VVI meeting_VVG her_PPHO1 ._. 
Ally_NN1 appreciated_VVD their_APPGE difficulty_NN1 ._. 
What_DDQ were_VBDR they_PPHS2 supposed_JJ to_TO say_VVI ,_, after_CS the_AT first_MD few_DA2 heartfelt_JJ encounters_NN2 ?_? 
All_DB ordinary_JJ transactions_NN2 were_VBDR contaminated_VVN :_: "_" How_RRQ are_VBR you_PPY ?_? "_" and_CC "_" How_RRQ 's_VBZ it_PPH1 going_VVG ?_? "_" and_CC "_" Nice_JJ day_NNT1 ._. "_" 
Even_RR "_" Bloody_RR awful_JJ day_NNT1 ,_, "_" which_DDQ it_PPH1 usually_RR was_VBDZ ,_, would_VM seem_VVI to_TO imply_VVI an_AT1 ordinary_JJ scale_NN1 of_IO gloom_NN1 ,_, which_DDQ her_APPGE family_NN1 was_VBDZ far_RR removed_VVN from_II and_CC could_VM n't_XX possibly_RR yet_RR find_VVI a_AT1 way_NN1 back_RP to_II ._. 
Hilda_NP1 came_VVD to_II the_AT center_NN1 for_IF a_AT1 week_NNT1 long_RR fiction-writing_JJ course_NN1 ._. 
She_PPHS1 was_VBDZ one_MC1 of_IO those_DD2 students_NN2 you_PPY learned_VVD to_TO pick_VVI out_RP at_II the_AT first_MD encounter_NN1 as_II a_AT1 potential_JJ flash_JJ point_NN1 ,_, someone_PN1 who_PNQS might_VM easily_RR be_VBI offended_VVN ,_, or_CC offend_VV0 others_NN2 ;_; you_PPY treated_VVN such_DA students_NN2 with_IW special_JJ consideration_NN1 ,_, but_CCB kept_VVD them_PPHO2 at_II arm_NN1 's_GE length_NN1 ._. 
She_PPHS1 was_VBDZ Canadian_JJ ,_, probably_RR in_II her_APPGE mid-fifties_MC2 ,_, small_JJ ,_, with_IW thick_JJ ,_, perfectly_RR white_JJ hair_NN1 chopped_VVD off_RP in_II a_AT1 crisp_JJ line_NN1 at_II her_APPGE shoulders_NN2 ;_; she_PPHS1 was_VBDZ a_AT1 vegan_NN1 ,_, and_CC had_VHD requested_VVN special_JJ dietary_JJ arrangements_NN2 in_II advance_NN1 ._. 
When_CS everyone_PN1 gathered_VVD around_II the_AT wood_NN1 stove_NN1 in_II the_AT drawing_NN1 room_NN1 of_IO the_AT old_JJ house_NN1 for_IF introductions_NN2 ,_, Hilda_NP1 chose_VVD to_TO sit_VVI cross-legged_JJ and_CC straight-backed_NN1 on_II the_AT floor_NN1 ,_, her_APPGE slight_JJ neat_JJ body_NN1 supple_JJ like_II a_AT1 child_NN1 's_GE ._. 
Although_CS she_PPHS1 was_VBDZ n't_XX unfriendly_JJ ,_, Ally_NN1 noticed_VVD that_CST she_PPHS1 did_VDD n't_XX join_VVI in_RP with_IW the_AT others_NN2 '_GE self-deprecation_NN1 :_: a_AT1 touch_NN1 of_IO impatience_NN1 snapped_VVD in_II her_APPGE expression_NN1 ._. 
Yet_RR she_PPHS1 obviously_RR suffered_VVD when_CS she_PPHS1 had_VHD to_TO read_VVI out_RP her_APPGE own_DA work_NN1 ._. 
She_PPHS1 must_VM have_VHI been_VBN good-looking_JJ when_CS she_PPHS1 was_VBDZ younger_JJR ,_, with_IW Scandinavian_JJ features_NN2 ,_, wide_JJ mouth_NN1 and_CC hard_JJ cheekbones_NN2 ,_, something_PN1 raw_JJ in_II her_APPGE eyes_NN2 ,_, their_APPGE hazel_JJ irises_NN2 flecked_VVN with_IW darker_JJR brown_NN1 ._. 
She_PPHS1 fixed_VVD the_AT tutors_NN2 ,_, while_CS they_PPHS2 were_VBDR talking_VVG ,_, with_IW a_AT1 steady_JJ ,_, critical_JJ ,_, attentive_JJ gaze_NN1 ._. 
Hilda_NP1 complained_VVD about_II the_AT farmer_NN1 whose_DDQGE land_NN1 they_PPHS2 were_VBDR walking_VVG on_RP ._. 
She_PPHS1 said_VVD that_CST she_PPHS1 had_VHD contacted_VVN the_AT R.S.P.C.A._NP1 because_CS he_PPHS1 did_VDD n't_XX treat_VVI the_AT foot_NN1 rot_NN1 in_II his_APPGE sheep_NN ,_, and_CC that_CST he_PPHS1 'd_VHD tried_VVN to_TO stop_VVI her_PPHO1 walking_VVG there_RL ,_, although_CS it_PPH1 was_VBDZ a_AT1 public_JJ right_NN1 of_IO way_NN1 ._. 
It_PPH1 was_VBDZ true_JJ that_CST quite_RG a_AT1 few_DA2 of_IO the_AT sheep_NN seemed_VVD to_TO be_VBI hobbling_VVG on_II three_MC legs_NN2 ,_, or_CC half_DB kneeling_VVG ,_, their_APPGE front_JJ legs_NN2 bent_VVN at_II the_AT joint_JJ ._. 
Ally_NN1 worried_VVD that_CST the_AT farmer_NN1 would_VM come_VVI out_RP to_TO confront_VVI them_PPHO2 ._. 
She_PPHS1 did_VDD n't_XX want_VVI to_TO have_VHI to_TO take_VVI sides_NN2 ._. 
As_CSA she_PPHS1 tramped_VVD beside_II Hilda_NP1 on_II the_AT way_NN1 back_NN1 ,_, the_AT day_NNT1 draining_VVG out_II21 of_II22 the_AT sky_NN1 seemed_VVD to_TO empty_VVI her_PPHO1 ,_, too_RR ,_, leaving_VVG her_APPGE weightless_JJ ._. 
When_CS they_PPHS2 arrived_VVD back_RP at_II the_AT cottage_NN1 ,_, they_PPHS2 could_VM still_RR see_VVI each_PPX221 other_PPX222 clearly_RR ,_, but_CCB the_AT light_NN1 was_VBDZ at_II its_APPGE moment_NN1 of_IO transition_NN1 ,_, and_CC ,_, as_CS31 soon_CS32 as_CS33 they_PPHS2 went_VVD inside_RL ,_, the_AT night_NNT1 outside_II the_AT windows_NN2 appeared_VVD perfectly_RR dark_JJ ._. 
In_II the_AT cottage_NN1 downstairs_RL there_EX was_VBDZ only_RR one_MC1 room_NN1 ,_, with_IW a_AT1 kitchen_NN1 at_II one_MC1 end_NN1 and_CC a_AT1 sitting_NN1 room_NN1 at_II the_AT other_JJ ,_, a_AT1 flagged_JJ floor_NN1 and_CC a_AT1 wood_NN1 fire_NN1 smoldering_VVG in_II a_AT1 wide_JJ stone_NN1 hearth_NN1 ,_, one_MC1 wall_NN1 stripped_VVD back_RP to_II the_AT naked_JJ stone_NN1 ._. 
Hilda_NP1 put_VVD logs_NN2 on_II the_AT fire_NN1 and_CC switched_VVD on_RP a_AT1 couple_NN1 of_IO lamps_NN2 ._. 
Although_CS Ally_NN1 loved_VVD books_NN2 ,_, she_PPHS1 had_VHD realized_VVN since_CS she_PPHS1 began_VVD working_VVG at_II the_AT center_NN1 that_CST she_PPHS1 did_VDD n't_XX have_VHI much_DA1 interest_NN1 in_II knowing_VVG how_RRQ they_PPHS2 were_VBDR written_VVN --_NN1 how_RRQ characters_NN2 were_VBDR developed_VVN or_CC plots_NN2 structured_VVN or_CC any_DD of_IO the_AT other_JJ things_NN2 the_AT teachers_NN2 held_VVD forth_RR about_RP and_CC the_AT students_NN2 soaked_VVD up_RP so_RG avidly_RR ._. 
All_DB of_IO them_PPHO2 ,_, writers_NN2 and_CC would-be_JJ writers_NN2 ,_, were_VBDR consumed_VVN with_IW a_AT1 sort_NN1 of_IO fever_NN1 over_II this_DD1 process_NN1 of_IO writing_NN1 and_CC being_VBG published_VVN ;_; some_DD of_IO the_AT would-bes_NN2 seemed_VVD to_TO hope_VVI that_CST by_II rubbing_VVG up_RP close_RR enough_RR against_II the_AT published_JJ ones_NN2 they_PPHS2 might_VM catch_VVI something_PN1 ._. 
That_DD1 week_NNT1 ,_, it_PPH1 was_VBDZ her_APPGE turn_NN1 to_TO take_VVI the_AT tutors_NN2 into_II town_NN1 for_IF the_AT mid-course_NN1 lunch_NN1 ._. 
Ann_NP1 said_VVD that_CST she_PPHS1 liked_VVD Hilda_NP1 --_NN1 she_PPHS1 'd_VHD had_VHN an_AT1 interesting_JJ life_NN1 ._. 
But_CCB Jim_NP1 ,_, who_PNQS was_VBDZ from_II Glasgow_NP1 ,_, tall_JJ and_CC loose-bodied_NN1 ,_, with_IW a_AT1 bald_JJ patch_NN1 like_II a_AT1 monk_NN1 's_GE tonsure_NN1 ,_, complained_VVD that_CST she_PPHS1 was_VBDZ wearing_VVG him_PPHO1 down_RP with_IW her_APPGE persistence_NN1 ._. 
"_" I_PPIS1 can_VM manage_VVI ,_, "_" she_PPHS1 said_VVD ._. 
"_" Cut_VV0 the_AT consumer_NN1 crap_NN1 ._. 
We_PPIS2 do_VD0 n't_XX need_VVI half_RR as_RG much_DA1 as_CSA they_PPHS2 want_VV0 to_TO persuade_VVI us_PPIO2 to_TO buy_VVI ._. 
How_RGQ long_RR I_PPIS1 'll_VM stay_VVI at_II the_AT health_NN1 center_NN1 I_PPIS1 do_VD0 n't_XX know_VVI ._. 
The_AT staff_NN are_VBR n't_XX friendly_JJ ._. "_" 
Ally_NN1 could_VM n't_XX imagine_VVI Hilda_NP1 fitting_VVG in_RP around_II here_RL ._. 
People_NN would_VM think_VVI she_PPHS1 was_VBDZ too_RG full_JJ of_IO herself_PPX1 :_: her_APPGE neat_JJ frame_NN1 seemed_VVD packed_VVN up_RP tight_RR with_IW personality_NN1 and_CC experience_NN1 ._. 
Her_APPGE self-sufficiency_NN1 made_VVD Ally_NN1 feel_VVI unformed_JJ ._. 
She_PPHS1 hung_VVD on_RP to_II the_AT mean_JJ little_JJ nugget_NN1 of_IO knowledge_NN1 :_: that_CST the_AT writers_NN2 on_II the_AT course_NN1 had_VHD said_VVN Hilda_NP1 was_VBDZ too_RG intense_JJ ,_, had_VHD no_AT sense_NN1 of_IO humor_NN1 ._. 
There_EX was_VBDZ no_AT sign_NN1 of_IO a_AT1 television_NN1 anywhere_RL in_II the_AT cottage_NN1 ,_, only_JJ shelves_NN2 of_IO books_NN2 ._. 
"_" Did_VDD n't_XX you_PPY ever_RR want_VVI to_TO go_VVI home_RL to_II Canada_NP1 ?_? "_" 
"_" England_NP1 's_GE home_NN1 ._. 
I_PPIS1 've_VH0 lived_VVN here_RL longer_RRR now_RT than_CSN I_PPIS1 lived_VVD there_RL ._. 
Anyway_RR ,_, two_MC of_IO my_APPGE children_NN2 live_VV0 in_II London_NP1 ,_, and_CC one_PN1 's_VBZ in_II Dundee_NP1 ._. 
I_PPIS1 could_VM n't_XX live_VVI thousands_NNO2 of_IO miles_NNU2 away_II21 from_II22 them_PPHO2 ._. "_" 
Hilda_NP1 told_VVD Ally_NN1 to_TO wrap_VVI herself_PPX1 in_II the_AT blanket_NN1 in_II31 front_II32 of_II33 the_AT fire_NN1 :_: she_PPHS1 explained_VVD that_CST it_PPH1 was_VBDZ a_AT1 button_NN1 blanket_NN1 ,_, made_VVN by_II a_AT1 Tlingit_NN1 artist_NN1 ._. 
Then_RT she_PPHS1 brought_VVD her_APPGE tea_NN1 and_CC a_AT1 slab_NN1 of_IO apple_NN1 cake_NN1 she_PPHS1 'd_VHD made_VVN herself_PPX1 ,_, without_IW eggs_NN2 or_CC dairy_NN1 ._. 
"_" I_PPIS1 want_VV0 to_TO ask_VVI you_PPY how_RRQ you_PPY are_VBR ,_, "_" she_PPHS1 said_VVD ,_, sitting_VVG on_II a_AT1 cushion_NN1 on_II the_AT hearthrug_NN1 ._. 
"_" Real_JJ question_NN1 ,_, not_XX the_AT polite_JJ version_NN1 ._. 
You_PPY can_VM tell_VVI me_PPIO1 it_PPH1 's_VBZ none_PN of_IO my_APPGE business_NN1 ._. 
We_PPIS2 hardly_RR know_VV0 each_PPX221 other_PPX222 ._. "_" 
"_" I_PPIS1 'm_VBM O.K._JJ "_" "_" You_PPY honored_VVD me_PPIO1 with_IW your_APPGE confidence_NN1 the_AT other_JJ day_NNT1 ._. "_" 
"_" I_PPIS1 'm_VBM really_RR O.K._JJ Why_RRQ do_VD0 n't_XX you_PPY tell_VVI me_PPIO1 about_II your_APPGE novel_NN1 instead_RR ?_? 
You_PPY said_VVD you_PPY had_VHD been_VBN waiting_VVG all_DB your_APPGE life_NN1 to_TO write_VVI it_PPH1 ._. "_" 
She_PPHS1 thought_VVD that_CST Hilda_NP1 flinched_VVD ._. 
"_" Outside_II the_AT shop_NN1 ?_? 
Did_VDD I_PPIS1 say_VVI that_DD1 ?_? "_" 
"_" Something_PN1 like_II that_DD1 ._. "_" 
Hilda_NP1 considered_VVD carefully_RR ._. 
"_" You_PPY 're_VBR angry_JJ because_CS I_PPIS1 talked_VVD about_II it_PPH1 so_RG seriously_RR ,_, as_CS21 if_CS22 my_APPGE novel_NN1 were_VBDR a_AT1 disaster_NN1 in_II the_AT real_JJ world_NN1 ._. 
But_CCB ,_, of_RR21 course_RR22 ,_, it_PPH1 ca_VM n't_XX be_VBI weighed_VVN in_II that_DD1 world_NN1 ._. 
Against_II the_AT life_NN1 of_IO one_MC1 of_IO my_APPGE children_NN2 ,_, say_VV0 ,_, it_PPH1 is_VBZ n't_XX a_AT1 feather_NN1 ._. 
Or_CC against_II the_AT life_NN1 of_IO anyone_PN1 's_GE child_NN1 ._. "_" 
"_" It_PPH1 mattered_VVD to_II you_PPY ,_, though_RR ._. "_" 
Ally_NN1 was_VBDZ n't_XX interested_JJ in_II the_AT novel_NN1 itself_PPX1 ._. 
She_PPHS1 wanted_VVD to_TO dig_VVI down_RP to_II the_AT raw_JJ shame_NN1 of_IO this_DD1 failure_NN1 in_II Hilda_NP1 ,_, this_DD1 thing_NN1 inside_II her_PPHO1 ,_, poisoning_VVG everything_PN1 ,_, cut_VV0 off_RP and_CC spoiled_VVD and_CC shrivelled_VVD up_RP ._. 
Ally_NN1 put_VVD her_APPGE hands_NN2 behind_II her_PPHO1 ._. 
"_" I_PPIS1 do_VD0 n't_XX want_VVI it_PPH1 ._. 
What_DDQ is_VBZ it_PPH1 ?_? "_" 
"_" A_AT1 stupid_JJ ring_NN1 Ryan_NP1 gave_VVD me_PPIO1 ._. "_" 
"_" I_PPIS1 do_VD0 n't_XX want_VVI it_PPH1 ._. "_" 
In_II a_AT1 spasm_NN1 of_IO temper_NN1 Yvonne_NP1 swung_VVD around_RP and_CC opened_VVD her_APPGE hand_NN1 ,_, flinging_VVG away_RL into_II the_AT river_NN1 something_PN1 tiny_JJ that_CST gave_VVD out_RP one_MC1 glint_NN1 of_IO light_NN1 before_CS it_PPH1 was_VBDZ swallowed_VVN without_IW a_AT1 splash_NN1 ,_, the_AT water_NN1 healing_NN1 instantly_RR behind_II it_PPH1 ._. 
The_AT moment_NN1 she_PPHS1 'd_VHD done_VDN it_PPH1 she_PPHS1 shrieked_VVD ,_, pressing_VVG her_APPGE hands_NN2 across_II her_APPGE mouth_NN1 ,_, and_CC said_VVD that_CST she_PPHS1 had_VHD n't_XX meant_VVN to_TO let_VVI it_PPH1 go_VVI ,_, it_PPH1 was_VBDZ an_AT1 accident_NN1 ._. 
"_" Ally_NN1 ,_, help_VV0 me_PPIO1 get_VVI it_PPH1 back_RP !_! "_" 
"_" Do_VD0 n't_XX be_VBI silly_JJ ._. 
The_AT water_NN1 's_VBZ too_RG deep_RR ._. 
You_PPY ca_VM n't_XX see_VVI to_II the_AT bottom_JJ --_NN1 you_PPY could_VM n't_XX find_VVI it_PPH1 in_II a_AT1 million_NNO years_NNT2 ._. 
It_PPH1 does_VDZ n't_XX matter_VVI ._. "_" 
Yvonne_NP1 went_VVD on_II shrieking_VVG and_CC pleading_VVG ._. 
Crouching_VVG on_II the_AT path_NN1 ,_, she_PPHS1 started_VVD untying_VVG her_APPGE trainers_NN2 ,_, dragging_VVG and_CC clawing_VVG at_II the_AT laces_NN2 ,_, as_CS21 if_CS22 she_PPHS1 were_VBDR going_VVGK to_TO wade_VVI in_RP ._. 
On_II an_AT1 impulse_NN1 ,_, because_CS the_AT whole_JJ scene_NN1 disgusted_VVD her_PPHO1 ,_, Ally_NN1 found_VVD herself_PPX1 calmly_RR stepping_VVG into_II the_AT river_NN1 with_IW her_APPGE trainers_NN2 still_RR on_RP ,_, wading_VVG across_II the_AT large_JJ flat_JJ submerged_JJ stones_NN2 at_II its_APPGE edge_NN1 ._. 
At_RR21 first_RR22 she_PPHS1 hardly_RR felt_VVD the_AT cold_NN1 ,_, only_RR the_AT pull_NN1 of_IO the_AT moving_JJ water_NN1 ,_, as_CS21 if_CS22 something_PN1 were_VBDR clamped_VVN around_II her_APPGE ankles_NN2 ._. 
Then_RT she_PPHS1 stepped_VVD down_RP into_II a_AT1 deeper_JJR channel_NN1 ,_, among_II the_AT smaller_JJR toffee-colored_JJ pebbles_NN2 of_IO the_AT riverbed_NN1 ;_; the_AT water_NN1 here_RL was_VBDZ halfway_RR up_II21 to_II22 her_APPGE calves_NN2 ,_, then_RT up_II21 to_II22 her_APPGE knees_NN2 ,_, soaking_VVG her_APPGE trousers_NN2 ,_, wrapping_VVG them_PPHO2 against_II her_APPGE legs_NN2 ,_, snatching_VVG her_APPGE breath_NN1 away_RL with_IW the_AT shock_NN1 of_IO the_AT cold_NN1 ._. 
The_AT force_NN1 of_IO the_AT current_JJ where_CS the_AT river_NN1 ran_VVD faster_RRR almost_RR knocked_VVD her_PPHO1 off_II balance_NN1 ,_, though_CS it_PPH1 looked_VVD lazy_JJ on_II the_AT surface_NN1 ._. 
She_PPHS1 steadied_VVD herself_PPX1 by_II hanging_VVG on_RP to_II a_AT1 slippery_JJ boulder_NN1 sticking_VVG up_RP midstream_RL and_CC wondered_VVD if_CS she_PPHS1 should_VM go_VVI any_DD farther_JJR ._. 
Her_APPGE jaw_NN1 was_VBDZ clenched_VVN ._. 
It_PPH1 was_VBDZ difficult_JJ to_TO remember_VVI how_RRQ to_TO move_VVI her_APPGE feet_NN2 in_II the_AT trainers_NN2 that_CST began_VVD to_TO feel_VVI numbingly_RR huge_JJ and_CC heavy_JJ ._. 
She_PPHS1 did_VDD n't_XX care_VVI about_II the_AT ring_NN1 :_: she_PPHS1 had_VHD stepped_VVN into_II the_AT water_NN1 only_RR to_TO make_VVI a_AT1 point_NN1 against_II the_AT hysterical_JJ performance_NN1 on_II the_AT riverbank_NN1 ,_, to_TO show_VVI it_PPH1 up_RP in_II some_DD way_NN1 that_CST was_VBDZ deliberate_JJ and_CC disdainful_JJ ._. 
When_CS she_PPHS1 turned_VVD to_TO look_VVI back_RP at_II Yvonne_NP1 ,_, she_PPHS1 was_VBDZ surprised_JJ at_II how_RGQ far_RR she_PPHS1 had_VHD come_VVN :_: Yvonne_NP1 on_II the_AT path_NN1 seemed_VVD distant_JJ ,_, hugging_VVG her_APPGE elbows_NN2 ,_, shouting_VVG directions_NN2 that_CST Ally_NN1 could_VM n't_XX hear_VVI over_II the_AT water_NN1 rushing_VVG past_RL ._. 
It_PPH1 seemed_VVD a_AT1 different_JJ universe_NN1 out_RP here_RL in_II the_AT river_NN1 ._. 
The_AT whole_JJ scene_NN1 ,_, the_AT sad_JJ story_NN1 that_CST had_VHD brought_VVN them_PPHO2 together_RL ,_, was_VBDZ framed_VVN for_IF her_PPHO1 for_IF a_AT1 moment_NN1 as_CS21 if_CS22 from_II some_DD far-off_JJ future_JJ perspective_NN1 ,_, and_CC her_APPGE rage_NN1 against_II Yvonne_NP1 washed_VVD out_II21 of_II22 her_PPHO1 ._. 
She_PPHS1 reached_VVD out_RP her_APPGE hand_NN1 to_TO take_VVI it_PPH1 ._. 
