<time>863_00:27:34,518 --> 00:27:36,318</time>
<s>就把他作为一种伴侣动物</s>
<time>864_00:27:36,678 --> 00:27:37,758</time>
<s>或者是一种宠物动物</s>
<time>865_00:27:38,118 --> 00:27:38,838</time>
<s>她通过贬损</s>
<time>866_00:27:39,198 --> 00:27:40,278</time>
<s>另外一半的能力</s>
<time>867_00:27:40,638 --> 00:27:42,058</time>
<s>和社会属性来建立说</s>
<time>868_00:27:42,418 --> 00:27:44,218</time>
<s>你看我是多么强多么能干</s>
<time>869_00:27:44,578 --> 00:27:45,298</time>
<s>多么的全能</s>
<time>870_00:27:45,658 --> 00:27:46,378</time>
<s>就是我觉得这种</s>
<time>871_00:27:46,738 --> 00:27:48,178</time>
<s>其实是没有必要的</s>
<time>872_00:27:48,538 --> 00:27:50,698</time>
<s>也没有必要去塑造这种对立</s>
<time>873_00:27:51,058 --> 00:27:53,573</time>
<s>你看就是严老师我觉得</s>
<time>874_00:27:53,933 --> 00:27:56,813</time>
<s>她是自己要求对自己</s>
<time>875_00:27:57,173 --> 00:27:58,613</time>
<s>要做到自己满意</s>
<time>876_00:27:58,973 --> 00:28:01,481</time>
<s>她是一个自为标准的一个要求</s>
<time>877_00:28:01,841 --> 00:28:02,561</time>
<s>但是我觉得</s>
<time>878_00:28:02,921 --> 00:28:04,001</time>
<s>你又说你说跳舞的</s>
<time>879_00:28:04,361 --> 00:28:04,721</time>
<s>其实我觉得很多跳舞的女孩儿</s>
<time>880_00:28:05,081 --> 00:28:06,881</time>
<s>其实我觉得很多跳舞的女孩儿圆桌派[看理想]</s>
<time>881_00:28:07,241 --> 00:28:10,121</time>
<s>她很难避免被别人评判</s>
<time>882_00:28:10,481 --> 00:28:12,980</time>
<s>就这个我觉得影响一辈子的</s>
<time>883_00:28:13,340 --> 00:28:15,860</time>
<s>就是我在想跟她们的生活</s>
<time>884_00:28:16,220 --> 00:28:16,940</time>
<s>有没有关系</s>
<time>885_00:28:17,300 --> 00:28:18,740</time>
<s>就你比如说从小</s>
<time>886_00:28:19,100 --> 00:28:21,975</time>
<s>那谁跳这个什么中间的位置</s>
<time>887_00:28:22,335 --> 00:28:23,415</time>
<s>谁跳前排</s>
<time>888_00:28:23,775 --> 00:28:26,655</time>
<s>完全是老师就说了算</s>
<time>889_00:28:27,015 --> 00:28:29,535</time>
<s>就是你从小是一个被挑选</s>
<time>890_00:28:29,895 --> 00:28:30,615</time>
<s>不管你多努力</s>
<time>891_00:28:30,975 --> 00:28:32,402</time>
<s>最终是他说她跳</s>
<time>892_00:28:32,762 --> 00:28:33,482</time>
<s>到时就在这儿</s>
<time>893_00:28:33,842 --> 00:28:36,002</time>
<s>那么你现在你推而广之</s>
<time>894_00:28:36,362 --> 00:28:38,522</time>
<s>很多这个女性</s>
<time>895_00:28:38,882 --> 00:28:40,682</time>
<s>她所谓的这个要好</s>
<time>896_00:28:41,042 --> 00:28:43,181</time>
<s>你比如说你知道就是有一个</s>
<time>897_00:28:43,541 --> 00:28:44,981</time>
<s>13岁的一个外国女孩</s>
<time>898_00:28:45,341 --> 00:28:46,421</time>
<s>在视频网站上</s>
<time>899_00:28:46,781 --> 00:28:48,221</time>
<s>她因为她的父母就是</s>
<time>900_00:28:48,581 --> 00:28:50,021</time>
<s>可能经常说你长得不好看</s>
<time>901_00:28:50,381 --> 00:28:50,741</time>
<s>她不知道自己</s>
<time>902_00:28:51,101 --> 00:28:52,536</time>
<s>长得好看不好看</s>
<time>903_00:28:52,896 --> 00:28:54,696</time>
<s>然后她就把自己弄在视频网站上</s>
<time>904_00:28:55,056 --> 00:28:56,496</time>
<s>她让全球的这个人就说</s>
<time>905_00:28:56,856 --> 00:28:59,376</time>
<s>你们说我长得好看不好看</s>
<time>906_00:28:59,736 --> 00:29:00,816</time>
<s>结果有一万多个</s>
<time>907_00:29:01,176 --> 00:29:02,243</time>
<s>说的特难听的这个话</s>
<time>908_00:29:02,603 --> 00:29:04,043</time>
<s>她就倍受打击</s>
<time>909_00:29:05,483 --> 00:29:07,643</time>
<s>你觉得这个女人</s>
<time>910_00:29:08,003 --> 00:29:10,163</time>
<s>是不是特别受这个周围的</s>
<time>911_00:29:10,523 --> 00:29:11,942</time>
<s>评判的这种影响</s>
<time>912_00:29:13,742 --> 00:29:15,182</time>
<s>对我很早就发现这一点</s>
<time>913_00:29:15,542 --> 00:29:17,342</time>
<s>你要做这个审美的客体</s>
<time>914_00:29:17,702 --> 00:29:19,142</time>
<s>还是做审美的主体对吧</s>
<time>915_00:29:19,502 --> 00:29:20,942</time>
<s>就是你这个</s>
<time>916_00:29:22,737 --> 00:29:23,817</time>
<s>很多的漂亮女孩子</s>
<time>917_00:29:24,177 --> 00:29:24,897</time>
<s>或者就跳舞的小姑娘</s>
<time>918_00:29:25,257 --> 00:29:27,777</time>
<s>她都是在审美的客体的</s>
<time>919_00:29:28,137 --> 00:29:29,217</time>
<s>这个问题上</s>
<time>920_00:29:29,577 --> 00:29:30,657</time>
<s>就非常被动你知道</s>
<time>921_00:29:31,017 --> 00:29:32,084</time>
<s>后来我就觉得</s>
<time>922_00:29:32,444 --> 00:29:35,684</time>
<s>我自己要有自己的一个</s>
<time>923_00:29:36,044 --> 00:29:37,844</time>
<s>就是对自己的一种行为什么</s>
<time>924_00:29:38,204 --> 00:29:38,924</time>
<s>要有一个就是</s>
<time>925_00:29:39,284 --> 00:29:40,004</time>
<s>比如说老公有这么喜欢别人的事儿圆桌派【看理想】</s>
<time>926_00:29:40,364 --> 00:29:42,142</time>
<s>比如说老公有这么喜欢别人的事儿</s>
<time>927_00:29:42,502 --> 00:29:45,382</time>
<s>就我不能表现出嫉妒对吧</s>
<time>928_00:29:45,742 --> 00:29:46,462</time>
<s>就是说我觉得</s>
<time>929_00:29:46,822 --> 00:29:48,982</time>
<s>嫉妒这件事儿很丑恶很俗气</s>
<time>930_00:29:51,502 --> 00:29:52,217</time>
<s>我看见我妈妈</s>
<time>931_00:29:52,577 --> 00:29:54,017</time>
<s>表现嫉妒的时候</s>
<time>932_00:29:54,377 --> 00:29:55,457</time>
<s>她就不可爱了是吧</s>
<time>933_00:29:55,817 --> 00:29:57,617</time>
<s>然后我就觉得我这辈子</s>
<time>934_00:29:57,977 --> 00:29:58,697</time>
<s>就得干这么一件事儿</s>
<time>935_00:29:59,057 --> 00:30:00,497</time>
<s>就不能表现嫉妒</s>
<time>936_00:30:00,857 --> 00:30:03,363</time>
<s>结果也是很害我自己的</s>
<time>937_00:30:04,083 --> 00:30:04,443</time>
<s>因为那个老公就</s>
<time>938_00:30:04,803 --> 00:30:05,883</time>
<s>我以前的老公就认为</s>
<time>939_00:30:06,243 --> 00:30:08,403</time>
<s>你看你你不没事儿吗</s>
<time>940_00:30:08,763 --> 00:30:10,923</time>
<s>怎么突然又有事儿了呢对吧</s>
<time>941_00:30:11,283 --> 00:30:12,003</time>
<s>所以就是这种</s>
<time>942_00:30:12,342 --> 00:30:13,062</time>
<s>有的时候实际上</s>
<time>943_00:30:13,422 --> 00:30:16,662</time>
<s>是一种前辈人对吧</s>
<time>944_00:30:17,022 --> 00:30:17,382</time>
<s>他们的伤害</s>
<time>945_00:30:17,742 --> 00:30:18,822</time>
<s>或者他们的这个</s>
<time>946_00:30:19,182 --> 00:30:20,622</time>
<s>他们的这种不足吧</s>
<time>947_00:30:20,982 --> 00:30:22,776</time>
<s>使我矫枉过正</s>
<time>948_00:30:23,136 --> 00:30:23,856</time>
<s>实际上是这样的</s>
<time>949_00:30:24,216 --> 00:30:26,736</time>
<s>那你现在会表现出</s>
<time>950_00:30:27,096 --> 00:30:28,176</time>
<s>你觉得这个</s>
<time>951_00:30:28,536 --> 00:30:29,616</time>
<s>原来觉得排斥的一面吗</s>
<time>952_00:30:31,416 --> 00:30:33,203</time>
<s>就是说应该真实对吧</s>
<time>953_00:30:33,563 --> 00:30:34,643</time>
<s>就是自己的这种</s>
<time>954_00:30:35,003 --> 00:30:36,803</time>
<s>你的这个水平在哪里</s>
<time>955_00:30:37,163 --> 00:30:39,323</time>
<s>你做人总是有个水平对吧</s>
<time>956_00:30:39,683 --> 00:30:41,483</time>
<s>你做人做得很烂</s>
<time>957_00:30:41,843 --> 00:30:42,901</time>
<s>水平很低对吧</s>
<time>958_00:30:43,261 --> 00:30:44,341</time>
<s>做女人做得很烂</s>
<time>959_00:30:44,701 --> 00:30:46,141</time>
<s>你也就是水平很低的一个人</s>
<time>960_00:30:46,501 --> 00:30:47,581</time>
<s>就是说老想把自己</s>
<time>961_00:30:47,941 --> 00:30:48,661</time>
<s>拔高到那个水平</s>
<time>962_00:30:49,021 --> 00:30:50,461</time>
<s>你根本达不到是吧</s>
<time>963_00:30:50,821 --> 00:30:51,541</time>
<s>你能做到就是</s>
<time>964_00:30:51,901 --> 00:30:54,775</time>
<s>你的老公有喜欢别的女人</s>
<time>965_00:30:55,135 --> 00:30:58,735</time>
<s>你完全就是一个淡然的那个</s>
<time>966_00:30:59,095 --> 00:30:59,455</time>
<s>那种态度</s>
<time>967_00:30:59,815 --> 00:31:01,255</time>
<s>做不到就别装对吧</s>
<time>968_00:31:01,615 --> 00:31:04,482</time>
<s>就我装多了就不行了</s>
<time>969_00:31:04,842 --> 00:31:06,642</time>
<s>那最后的伤害就是</s>
<time>970_00:31:07,002 --> 00:31:09,162</time>
<s>这种不真实的对吧</s>
<time>971_00:31:09,522 --> 00:31:10,602</time>
<s>就是这种不诚实</s>
<time>972_00:31:10,962 --> 00:31:12,740</time>
<s>实际上就还是不够诚实</s>
<time>973_00:31:13,100 --> 00:31:13,820</time>
<s>对自己的这个</s>
<time>974_00:31:14,180 --> 00:31:14,540</time>
<s>你不能克制</s>
<time>975_00:31:14,900 --> 00:31:18,140</time>
<s>为什么一定克制就是好呢对吧</s>
<time>976_00:31:18,500 --> 00:31:20,300</time>
<s>那不诚实也是因为把自己</s>
<time>977_00:31:20,660 --> 00:31:22,100</time>
<s>看作一个审美的客体吗</s>
<time>978_00:31:22,460 --> 00:31:22,814</time>
<s>就是你觉得</s>
<time>979_00:31:23,174 --> 00:31:24,254</time>
<s>是有一个无形的眼睛</s>
<time>980_00:31:24,614 --> 00:31:24,974</time>
<s>在看着自己的行为</s>
<time>981_00:31:25,334 --> 00:31:25,694</time>
<s>对</s>
<time>982_00:31:26,054 --> 00:31:27,854</time>
<s>都说这个男女现在都平等</s>
<time>983_00:31:28,214 --> 00:31:28,934</time>
<s>但说实在的</s>
<time>984_00:31:29,294 --> 00:31:30,734</time>
<s>我觉得还真不太一样</s>
<time>985_00:31:31,094 --> 00:31:31,814</time>
<s>或者说我们都是</s>
<time>986_00:31:32,174 --> 00:31:33,240</time>
<s>受过去的影响</s>
<time>987_00:31:33,600 --> 00:31:35,040</time>
<s>走到今天的人</s>
<time>988_00:31:35,400 --> 00:31:36,480</time>
<s>就是这个打分机制</s>
<time>989_00:31:36,840 --> 00:31:37,560</time>
<s>有的女孩子就说</s>
<time>990_00:31:37,920 --> 00:31:40,440</time>
<s>说我们好像这个从小到大</s>
<time>991_00:31:40,800 --> 00:31:42,600</time>
<s>一直在接受别人的打分</s>
<time>992_00:31:42,938 --> 00:31:45,098</time>
<s>在不同的圈子</s>
<time>993_00:31:45,458 --> 00:31:46,178</time>
<s>不同的单位</s>
<time>994_00:31:46,538 --> 00:31:47,258</time>
<s>好像就是这件事儿</s>
<time>995_00:31:47,618 --> 00:31:49,418</time>
<s>对于女孩子来讲</s>
<time>996_00:31:49,778 --> 00:31:51,218</time>
<s>似乎变得特别大的重要</s>
<time>997_00:31:51,578 --> 00:31:52,658</time>
<s>甚至有人都统计出来说</s>
<time>998_00:31:53,012 --> 00:31:54,812</time>
<s>我一辈子要被打六十万次分</s>
<time>999_00:31:55,172 --> 00:31:55,532</time>
<s>就是你比如</s>
<time>1000_00:31:55,892 --> 00:31:56,612</time>
<s>她还有点自恋了</s>
<time>1001_00:31:56,972 --> 00:31:58,052</time>
<s>谁打六十万次</s>
<time>1002_00:31:58,412 --> 00:31:59,492</time>
<s>你体面不体面</s>
<time>1003_00:31:59,852 --> 00:32:00,932</time>
<s>或者说你做的</s>
<time>1004_00:32:01,292 --> 00:32:03,798</time>
<s>这个合不合仪态对吧</s>
<time>1005_00:32:04,158 --> 00:32:05,958</time>
<s>包括你的这个工作能力</s>
<time>1006_00:32:06,318 --> 00:32:07,398</time>
<s>包括你的模样</s>
<time>1007_00:32:07,758 --> 00:32:09,198</time>
<s>很多时候女孩儿之间</s>
<time>1008_00:32:10,278 --> 00:32:11,718</time>
<s>她也是有一个</s>
<time>1009_00:32:12,078 --> 00:32:14,216</time>
<s>这个打分的机制在互相看</s>
<time>1010_00:32:14,576 --> 00:32:15,656</time>
<s>互相看对方</s>
<time>1011_00:32:16,016 --> 00:32:17,816</time>
<s>你好像就摆脱了</s>
<time>1012_00:32:18,176 --> 00:32:19,256</time>
<s>我才没摆脱呢</s>
<time>1013_00:32:19,616 --> 00:32:20,696</time>
<s>我表现得摆脱而已</s>
<time>1014_00:32:21,056 --> 00:32:21,416</time>
<s>你自己给自己打一百分</s>
<time>1015_00:32:22,856 --> 00:32:24,289</time>
<s>不就是说假如说今天</s>
<time>1016_00:32:24,649 --> 00:32:25,369</time>
<s>你曾经有这个压力吗</s>
<time>1017_00:32:25,729 --> 00:32:27,529</time>
<s>比如说我早上想好了</s>
<time>1018_00:32:27,889 --> 00:32:28,969</time>
<s>今天一定要完成</s>
<time>1019_00:32:29,329 --> 00:32:31,129</time>
<s>这么长时间的写作对吧</s>
<time>1020_00:32:31,489 --> 00:32:32,569</time>
<s>就是甬管写多少字吧</s>
<time>1021_00:32:32,929 --> 00:32:33,995</time>
<s>但是你这个时间</s>
<time>1022_00:32:34,355 --> 00:32:35,795</time>
<s>一定要坐在这个课桌前</s>
<time>1023_00:32:36,155 --> 00:32:37,235</time>
<s>然后写完东西了</s>
<time>1024_00:32:37,595 --> 00:32:39,395</time>
<s>没有乱浪费时间</s>
<time>1025_00:32:39,755 --> 00:32:41,915</time>
<s>在手机上弄什么弄</s>
<time>1026_00:32:42,275 --> 00:32:43,693</time>
<s>就自我纵容吧</s>
<time>1027_00:32:44,053 --> 00:32:45,853</time>
<s>然后我就去直接去游泳了</s>
<time>1028_00:32:46,213 --> 00:32:47,293</time>
<s>游泳完了以后呢</s>
<time>1029_00:32:47,653 --> 00:32:50,173</time>
<s>然后我就去买菜了对吧</s>
<time>1030_00:32:50,533 --> 00:32:51,973</time>
<s>然后完了以后买菜回来呢</s>
<time>1031_00:32:52,333 --> 00:32:54,486</time>
<s>我就读了俩小时的书</s>
<time>1032_00:32:54,846 --> 00:32:57,006</time>
<s>我觉得我今天一天没有纵容过</s>
<time>1033_00:32:57,366 --> 00:32:58,806</time>
<s>太纵容过自己</s>
<time>1034_00:32:59,166 --> 00:33:00,606</time>
<s>那个时候就是说</s>
<time>1035_00:33:00,966 --> 00:33:01,326</time>
<s>其实自我纵容吧</s>
<time>1036_00:33:01,686 --> 00:33:03,126</time>
<s>就是你当时感觉好</s>
<time>1037_00:33:03,471 --> 00:33:03,831</time>
<s>纵容完了呢</s>
<time>1038_00:33:04,191 --> 00:33:04,551</time>
<s>就是你</s>
<time>1039_00:33:04,911 --> 00:33:05,271</time>
<s>后悔</s>
<time>1040_00:33:05,631 --> 00:33:06,351</time>
<s>末了感觉好对吧</s>
<time>1041_00:33:06,711 --> 00:33:10,311</time>
<s>你到这个这件事情终结的时候</s>
<time>1042_00:33:10,671 --> 00:33:12,471</time>
<s>你觉得你看我今天计划的事</s>
<time>1043_00:33:12,831 --> 00:33:14,249</time>
<s>我是一个有效率的人</s>
<time>1044_00:33:14,609 --> 00:33:16,049</time>
<s>今天我有效率对吧</s>
<time>1045_00:33:16,409 --> 00:33:20,009</time>
<s>然后就是如果一天本来想好的</s>
<time>1046_00:33:20,369 --> 00:33:21,809</time>
<s>到了最后就各种各样的对吧</s>
<time>1047_00:33:22,169 --> 00:33:23,602</time>
<s>想着怎么着</s>
<time>1048_00:33:23,962 --> 00:33:26,482</time>
<s>就是手机上花了多长时间</s>
<time>1049_00:33:26,842 --> 00:33:29,362</time>
<s>然后打扮上花了多长时间</s>
<time>1050_00:33:29,722 --> 00:33:32,962</time>
<s>然后就是这就觉得挺讨厌的</s>
<time>1051_00:33:33,322 --> 00:33:34,388</time>
<s>自己挺讨厌自己的</s>
<time>1052_00:33:34,748 --> 00:33:37,268</time>
<s>它是一个成功者就有一个铁律</s>
<time>1053_00:33:37,628 --> 00:33:38,708</time>
<s>就是凡是成功者</s>
<time>1054_00:33:39,068 --> 00:33:40,148</time>
<s>他有很多品质</s>
<time>1055_00:33:40,508 --> 00:33:41,948</time>
<s>但有一个品质是共有的</s>
<time>1056_00:33:42,308 --> 00:33:42,668</time>
<s>叫自律</s>
<time>1057_00:33:43,028 --> 00:33:43,388</time>
<s>她刚才讲了半天</s>
<time>1058_00:33:43,725 --> 00:33:44,445</time>
<s>都是一个自律</s>
<time>1059_00:33:44,805 --> 00:33:45,885</time>
<s>对她就特别自律</s>
<time>1060_00:33:46,245 --> 00:33:47,685</time>
<s>就是我现在第一个自律</s>
<time>1061_00:33:48,045 --> 00:33:49,845</time>
<s>就是我要少吃</s>
<time>1062_00:33:50,205 --> 00:33:50,925</time>
<s>但我最近有点放纵</s>
<time>1063_00:33:52,365 --> 00:33:53,445</time>
<s>一出国他就胖</s>
<time>1064_00:33:53,798 --> 00:33:55,958</time>
<s>然后而且一天一斤地往上涨</s>
<time>1065_00:33:56,318 --> 00:33:59,558</time>
<s>然后就是你吃的时候会很高兴</s>
<time>1066_00:33:59,918 --> 00:34:00,998</time>
<s>因为胃口很好</s>
<time>1067_00:34:01,358 --> 00:34:03,158</time>
<s>但是晚上以后一踩秤上吧</s>
<time>1068_00:34:03,518 --> 00:34:04,583</time>
<s>就心里沮丧半天</s>
<time>1069_00:34:04,943 --> 00:34:06,743</time>
<s>那么你走入这个社会</s>
<time>1070_00:34:07,103 --> 00:34:07,823</time>
<s>因为我到这岁数</s>
<time>1071_00:34:08,183 --> 00:34:09,623</time>
<s>有时候我确实</s>
<time>1072_00:34:09,983 --> 00:34:10,703</time>
<s>不如我原来自律</s>
<time>1073_00:34:11,063 --> 00:34:12,143</time>
<s>就是原来想做的事儿</s>
<time>1074_00:34:12,503 --> 00:34:12,863</time>
<s>一定要做到</s>
<time>1075_00:34:13,223 --> 00:34:15,720</time>
<s>如果我说我要放弃掉这件事儿</s>
<time>1076_00:34:16,080 --> 00:34:16,440</time>
<s>那就这件事儿</s>
<time>1077_00:34:16,800 --> 00:34:17,520</time>
<s>我已经知道不成了</s>
<time>1078_00:34:17,880 --> 00:34:18,600</time>
<s>我才去放弃</s>
<time>1079_00:34:18,960 --> 00:34:20,040</time>
<s>就知道什么时候放弃</s>
<time>1080_00:34:20,400 --> 00:34:21,120</time>
<s>而不是知道</s>
<time>1081_00:34:21,480 --> 00:34:22,560</time>
<s>这个事儿可以做成的时候</s>
<time>1082_00:34:22,920 --> 00:34:23,640</time>
<s>你为了偷懒</s>
<time>1083_00:34:23,993 --> 00:34:25,073</time>
<s>为了什么事情</s>
<time>1084_00:34:25,433 --> 00:34:26,153</time>
<s>那时候我们做编辑</s>
<time>1085_00:34:26,513 --> 00:34:27,953</time>
<s>写东西熬夜干什么</s>
<time>1086_00:34:28,313 --> 00:34:29,393</time>
<s>谁不愿意躺床上</s>
<time>1087_00:34:29,753 --> 00:34:31,553</time>
<s>去看个电视剧睡个觉</s>
<time>1088_00:34:31,913 --> 00:34:32,633</time>
<s>多舒服</s>
<time>1089_00:34:32,993 --> 00:34:34,058</time>
<s>但是趴在桌子上</s>
<time>1090_00:34:34,418 --> 00:34:35,498</time>
<s>她老说她写作还是一个</s>
<time>1091_00:34:36,578 --> 00:34:37,658</time>
<s>还是一个很愉快的</s>
<time>1092_00:34:38,018 --> 00:34:38,738</time>
<s>写作那个愉快</s>
<time>1093_00:34:39,098 --> 00:34:41,978</time>
<s>是她写作状态最好的时候</s>
<time>1094_00:34:42,338 --> 00:34:43,418</time>
<s>写作是个很辛苦的事儿</s>
<time>1095_00:34:43,778 --> 00:34:45,195</time>
<s>你千万不要给大家一个误会</s>
<time>1096_00:34:45,555 --> 00:34:48,075</time>
<s>认为写作是一个很轻松的事儿</s>
<time>1097_00:34:48,435 --> 00:34:50,595</time>
<s>没有多少人写作是轻松的</s>
<time>1098_00:34:50,955 --> 00:34:52,755</time>
<s>脑力劳动比体力劳动累</s>
<time>1099_00:34:54,548 --> 00:34:56,708</time>
<s>我们过去我干过重体力劳动</s>
<time>1100_00:34:57,068 --> 00:34:58,508</time>
<s>那就睡一觉起来啥事儿也没有</s>
<time>1101_00:34:58,868 --> 00:35:00,308</time>
<s>脑子要是用过度了以后</s>
<time>1102_00:35:00,668 --> 00:35:02,468</time>
<s>长时间的那种状态</s>
<time>1103_00:35:02,828 --> 00:35:04,253</time>
<s>就说不上来就是累心</s>
<time>1104_00:35:04,613 --> 00:35:06,053</time>
<s>如果她进入一个</s>
<time>1105_00:35:06,413 --> 00:35:08,573</time>
<s>就是高兴奋状态写作的时候</s>
<time>1106_00:35:08,933 --> 00:35:09,653</time>
<s>当她结束了</s>
<time>1107_00:35:10,013 --> 00:35:11,093</time>
<s>她就有一段时间退不出来</s>
<time>1108_00:35:11,453 --> 00:35:11,813</time>
<s>就是兴奋</s>
<time>1109_00:35:12,173 --> 00:35:12,893</time>
<s>是</s>
<time>1110_00:35:13,253 --> 00:35:14,670</time>
<s>非常兴奋就退不下来</s>
<time>1111_00:35:15,030 --> 00:35:15,390</time>
<s>所以我要喝酒</s>
<time>1112_00:35:16,830 --> 00:35:17,550</time>
<s>所以她就靠这个</s>
<time>1113_00:35:17,910 --> 00:35:19,710</time>
<s>你说她三十年失眠怎么来的</s>
<time>1114_00:35:20,070 --> 00:35:21,510</time>
<s>我过去我也写东西</s>
<time>1115_00:35:21,870 --> 00:35:22,590</time>
<s>我现在懒</s>
<time>1116_00:35:22,950 --> 00:35:23,670</time>
<s>我写东西</s>
<time>1117_00:35:24,030 --> 00:35:25,462</time>
<s>过去写东西有一个最大的问题</s>
<time>1118_00:35:25,822 --> 00:35:27,622</time>
<s>就是写完以后两小时之内</s>
<time>1119_00:35:27,982 --> 00:35:28,702</time>
<s>是不可能入睡的</s>
<time>1120_00:35:29,062 --> 00:35:30,502</time>
<s>方舟你说</s>
<time>1121_00:35:30,862 --> 00:35:32,302</time>
<s>就平常咱们评价</s>
<time>1122_00:35:32,662 --> 00:35:34,447</time>
<s>说某个男人很厉害</s>
<time>1123_00:35:34,807 --> 00:35:38,047</time>
<s>和今天评价说某个女人很厉害</s>
<time>1124_00:35:38,407 --> 00:35:39,127</time>
<s>这个标准是一样的吗</s>
<time>1125_00:35:39,487 --> 00:35:39,847</time>
<s>我觉得不一样</s>
<time>1126_00:35:40,207 --> 00:35:41,647</time>
<s>就是我后来发现好多男的</s>
<time>1127_00:35:42,007 --> 00:35:43,087</time>
<s>在评价这个女的的时候</s>
<time>1128_00:35:43,447 --> 00:35:44,527</time>
<s>他评价别的男的</s>
<time>1129_00:35:44,887 --> 00:35:45,247</time>
<s>其实是专业能力</s>
<time>1130_00:35:45,607 --> 00:35:46,327</time>
<s>这个人是个好主持人</s>
<time>1131_00:35:46,687 --> 00:35:48,847</time>
<s>这个人是一个好导演</s>
<time>1132_00:35:49,207 --> 00:35:50,647</time>
<s>这个人是一个好作家怎么样</s>
<time>1133_00:35:51,007 --> 00:35:51,727</time>
<s>但他评价女人的时候</s>
<time>1134_00:35:52,087 --> 00:35:52,807</time>
<s>他们经常会采取一个</s>
<time>1135_00:35:53,167 --> 00:35:54,247</time>
<s>最显而易见的标准</s>
<time>1136_00:35:54,599 --> 00:35:55,679</time>
<s>她是一个美女</s>
<time>1137_00:35:56,039 --> 00:35:57,479</time>
<s>或者她是一个好女人</s>
<time>1138_00:35:57,839 --> 00:35:58,559</time>
<s>你知道他就会把她</s>
<time>1139_00:35:58,919 --> 00:36:01,079</time>
<s>其他的专业能力全部都去掉</s>
<time>1140_00:36:01,439 --> 00:36:02,519</time>
<s>最后以一个性别标准</s>
<time>1141_00:36:02,879 --> 00:36:03,959</time>
<s>或者是因为长相</s>
<time>1142_00:36:04,319 --> 00:36:05,743</time>
<s>这个是最好评判的标准</s>
<time>1143_00:36:06,103 --> 00:36:06,823</time>
<s>你不需要专业技能</s>
<time>1144_00:36:07,183 --> 00:36:07,903</time>
<s>你就可以评判这个人</s>
<time>1145_00:36:08,263 --> 00:36:08,983</time>
<s>长得好不好看</s>
<time>1146_00:36:09,343 --> 00:36:09,703</time>
<s>所以有的时候</s>
<time>1147_00:36:10,063 --> 00:36:12,943</time>
<s>我确实在这一点上会挺沮丧的</s>
<time>1148_00:36:13,303 --> 00:36:14,023</time>
<s>而且我挺期待自己</s>
<time>1149_00:36:14,383 --> 00:36:15,823</time>
<s>赶紧四十岁五十岁</s>
<time>1150_00:36:16,183 --> 00:36:18,343</time>
<s>这样就大家不会讨论你的长相</s>
<time>1151_00:36:18,703 --> 00:36:19,783</time>
<s>你知道就是你长得好看</s>
<time>1152_00:36:20,143 --> 00:36:20,863</time>
<s>或者不好看你无所谓了</s>
<time>1153_00:36:21,223 --> 00:36:22,303</time>
<s>就是这个长相逐渐</s>
<time>1154_00:36:22,663 --> 00:36:23,383</time>
<s>那时候就讨论气质了</s>
<time>1155_00:36:24,463 --> 00:36:25,175</time>
<s>还是有问题</s>
<time>1156_00:36:25,535 --> 00:36:26,255</time>
<s>另外一个伽锁是吗</s>
<time>1157_00:36:26,615 --> 00:36:28,415</time>
<s>你比如说咱们这一说什么叫</s>
<time>1158_00:36:28,775 --> 00:36:29,855</time>
<s>林徽因</s>
<time>1159_00:36:30,215 --> 00:36:31,295</time>
<s>谁都不能否认的是</s>
<time>1160_00:36:31,655 --> 00:36:33,815</time>
<s>这里边儿有个颜值的因素对吧</s>
<time>1161_00:36:34,175 --> 00:36:34,879</time>
<s>对</s>
<time>1162_00:36:35,239 --> 00:36:37,399</time>
<s>陆小曼</s>
<time>1163_00:36:37,759 --> 00:36:38,119</time>
<s>对</s>
<time>1164_00:36:38,479 --> 00:36:40,279</time>
<s>是吧咱们说哪个女的很厉害</s>
<time>1165_00:36:40,639 --> 00:36:43,159</time>
<s>都叫才貌双全是不是</s>
<time>1166_00:36:43,879 --> 00:36:46,039</time>
<s>而且甚至就像刚才我讲的</s>
<time>1167_00:36:46,399 --> 00:36:48,919</time>
<s>就是好像包括女人都这么评价</s>
<time>1168_00:36:49,279 --> 00:36:51,079</time>
<s>她的老公也好</s>
<time>1169_00:36:51,439 --> 00:36:52,159</time>
<s>她的家庭也好</s>
<time>1170_00:36:52,519 --> 00:36:53,239</time>
<s>她的事业也好</s>
<time>1171_00:36:53,599 --> 00:36:55,031</time>
<s>她什么都好</s>
<time>1172_00:36:55,391 --> 00:36:56,471</time>
<s>才叫厉害对吧</s>
<time>1173_00:36:56,831 --> 00:36:57,551</time>
<s>但是一个男人呢</s>
<time>1174_00:36:57,911 --> 00:36:58,991</time>
<s>他有一点厉害都可以了</s>
<time>1175_00:36:59,351 --> 00:37:01,151</time>
<s>对你都不知道他家庭</s>
<time>1176_00:37:01,511 --> 00:37:03,671</time>
<s>谁是他老婆你都不用管他</s>
<time>1177_00:37:04,391 --> 00:37:05,455</time>
<s>我觉得这就是一个</s>
<time>1178_00:37:05,815 --> 00:37:07,615</time>
<s>非常糟糕的评价标准</s>
<time>1179_00:37:07,975 --> 00:37:10,135</time>
<s>因为男作家没有人说这个人</s>
<time>1180_00:37:10,495 --> 00:37:10,855</time>
<s>这个作家</s>
<time>1181_00:37:11,215 --> 00:37:12,295</time>
<s>刘震云</s>
<time>1182_00:37:12,655 --> 00:37:13,015</time>
<s>丑不丑是么</s>
<time>1183_00:37:13,375 --> 00:37:14,095</time>
<s>他是个男作家</s>
<time>1184_00:37:14,455 --> 00:37:15,174</time>
<s>没有人这么说</s>
<time>1185_00:37:15,534 --> 00:37:16,614</time>
<s>她是个女作家</s>
<time>1186_00:37:16,974 --> 00:37:18,414</time>
<s>大家就是作家</s>
<time>1187_00:37:18,774 --> 00:37:19,134</time>
<s>你别说我是男的</s>
<time>1188_00:37:19,494 --> 00:37:20,574</time>
<s>或者是女的</s>
<time>1189_00:37:20,934 --> 00:37:22,734</time>
<s>我的书是中性的对吧</s>
<time>1190_00:37:23,094 --> 00:37:25,246</time>
<s>就这一点就是我就觉得</s>
<time>1191_00:37:25,606 --> 00:37:26,686</time>
<s>这是全世界的一个毛病</s>
<time>1192_00:37:27,046 --> 00:37:28,126</time>
<s>也不是中国的</s>
<time>1193_00:37:28,486 --> 00:37:30,646</time>
<s>我去年到阿布扎比去</s>
<time>1194_00:37:31,006 --> 00:37:33,526</time>
<s>然后就是就有一个</s>
<time>1195_00:37:33,886 --> 00:37:36,750</time>
<s>很大的一个课题</s>
<time>1196_00:37:37,110 --> 00:37:38,550</time>
<s>就是说为什么好莱坞的男星</s>
<time>1197_00:37:38,910 --> 00:37:39,990</time>
<s>就要比女星</s>
<time>1198_00:37:41,070 --> 00:37:42,150</time>
<s>酬劳高对吧</s>
<time>1199_00:37:42,510 --> 00:37:45,389</time>
<s>为什么就是女作家总是不能</s>
<time>1200_00:37:45,749 --> 00:37:48,269</time>
<s>不能得到就是这个最serious（庄重的）</s>
<time>1201_00:37:48,629 --> 00:37:51,509</time>
<s>你像诺奖也好什么也好</s>
<time>1202_00:37:51,869 --> 00:37:55,109</time>
<s>她都是就是有那么一点儿对吧</s>
<time>1203_00:37:55,460 --> 00:37:57,260</time>
<s>就是但是最serious（庄重的）</s>
<time>1204_00:37:57,620 --> 00:38:01,220</time>
<s>就是最正经八百被对待的都是男的</s>
<time>1205_00:38:01,580 --> 00:38:03,020</time>
<s>所以这个就是我说是吗</s>
<time>1206_00:38:03,380 --> 00:38:04,100</time>
<s>我说这么一想</s>
<time>1207_00:38:04,460 --> 00:38:05,524</time>
<s>对是这样的</s>
<time>1208_00:38:05,884 --> 00:38:07,684</time>
<s>就是我特别反感人家说女作家</s>
<time>1209_00:38:08,044 --> 00:38:09,484</time>
<s>我说我这名字就是一女的了</s>
<time>1210_00:38:09,844 --> 00:38:10,564</time>
<s>你还用在前面</s>
<time>1211_00:38:10,924 --> 00:38:12,364</time>
<s>再加一个女作家吗对不对</s>
<time>1212_00:38:13,444 --> 00:38:14,164</time>
<s>因为女作家少</s>
<time>1213_00:38:14,524 --> 00:38:15,244</time>
<s>你再有一个</s>
<time>1214_00:38:15,603 --> 00:38:17,403</time>
<s>因为长期以来是男权社会</s>
<time>1215_00:38:17,763 --> 00:38:18,483</time>
<s>这个你到今天为止</s>
<time>1216_00:38:18,843 --> 00:38:20,643</time>
<s>今天尽管现在女权</s>
<time>1217_00:38:21,003 --> 00:38:22,443</time>
<s>提出了很多的要求了</s>
<time>1218_00:38:22,803 --> 00:38:23,883</time>
<s>但今天全社会</s>
<time>1219_00:38:24,243 --> 00:38:25,323</time>
<s>还是个男权社会</s>
<time>1220_00:38:25,674 --> 00:38:26,394</time>
<s>但是有一个征兆</s>
<time>1221_00:38:26,754 --> 00:38:27,834</time>
<s>是对女性非常好的</s>
<time>1222_00:38:28,194 --> 00:38:30,354</time>
<s>就是说我想在未来的一百年</s>
<time>1223_00:38:30,714 --> 00:38:32,874</time>
<s>它逐渐地会女权大于男权</s>
<time>1224_00:38:33,234 --> 00:38:35,738</time>
<s>现在女性国家领导人急剧增加</s>
<time>1225_00:38:36,098 --> 00:38:37,538</time>
<s>这个比例数字在增加</s>
<time>1226_00:38:37,898 --> 00:38:39,698</time>
<s>这个还有企业领导人</s>
<time>1227_00:38:40,058 --> 00:38:41,138</time>
<s>女性的企业领导人</s>
<time>1228_00:38:41,498 --> 00:38:42,218</time>
<s>也在急剧增加</s>
<time>1229_00:38:42,578 --> 00:38:43,658</time>
<s>是因为你摆脱了</s>
<time>1230_00:38:44,018 --> 00:38:46,177</time>
<s>那种过去靠劳动力</s>
<time>1231_00:38:46,537 --> 00:38:47,617</time>
<s>去统治这个社会</s>
<time>1232_00:38:47,977 --> 00:38:49,777</time>
<s>就是你胳膊粗没有用</s>
<time>1233_00:38:50,137 --> 00:38:50,857</time>
<s>现在得脑袋灵是吧</s>
<time>1234_00:38:51,217 --> 00:38:51,937</time>
<s>膊粗没有用</s>
<time>1235_00:38:52,297 --> 00:38:53,377</time>
<s>那这个时候女性的地位</s>
<time>1236_00:38:53,737 --> 00:38:54,817</time>
<s>就急剧提高</s>
<time>1237_00:38:55,177 --> 00:38:56,968</time>
<s>但是你写的这个小说里边儿的</s>
<time>1238_00:38:57,328 --> 00:38:58,408</time>
<s>这个女性人物</s>
<time>1239_00:38:58,768 --> 00:39:00,568</time>
<s>我都觉得是非常善于</s>
<time>1240_00:39:00,928 --> 00:39:02,368</time>
<s>在男人的夹缝当中</s>
<time>1241_00:39:02,728 --> 00:39:04,888</time>
<s>发挥所谓女性的优势</s>
<time>1242_00:39:06,671 --> 00:39:07,391</time>
<s>你觉得在今天</s>
<time>1243_00:39:07,751 --> 00:39:09,551</time>
<s>在这种所谓男权社会里</s>
<time>1244_00:39:09,911 --> 00:39:12,431</time>
<s>实际上好像存在着一种女性</s>
<time>1245_00:39:12,791 --> 00:39:13,871</time>
<s>我有时候在她的小说里</s>
<time>1246_00:39:14,231 --> 00:39:16,750</time>
<s>我会想到就过去的一些交际花</s>
<time>1247_00:39:17,110 --> 00:39:19,270</time>
<s>就是当然你从某种角度上讲</s>
<time>1248_00:39:19,630 --> 00:39:21,070</time>
<s>她是一种什么产物</s>
<time>1249_00:39:21,430 --> 00:39:22,150</time>
<s>男权社会的产物</s>
<time>1250_00:39:22,510 --> 00:39:23,950</time>
<s>但是在另一方面你就觉得</s>
<time>1251_00:39:24,310 --> 00:39:26,101</time>
<s>她在这种夹缝当中</s>
<time>1252_00:39:26,461 --> 00:39:28,261</time>
<s>那种游刃有余</s>
<time>1253_00:39:29,701 --> 00:39:31,861</time>
<s>你觉得这存在不存在一种</s>
<time>1254_00:39:32,221 --> 00:39:33,301</time>
<s>就利用自己的性别优势是吧</s>
<time>1255_00:39:33,661 --> 00:39:34,381</time>
<s>所谓的性别优势</s>
<time>1256_00:39:35,101 --> 00:39:39,044</time>
<s>我都是活得糊里糊涂的</s>
<time>1257_00:39:39,404 --> 00:39:40,844</time>
<s>我都没有什么意识</s>
<time>1258_00:39:41,204 --> 00:39:44,804</time>
<s>我就是这里面的这些女性</s>
<time>1259_00:39:45,164 --> 00:39:47,323</time>
<s>当然我有很多参照对吧</s>
<time>1260_00:39:47,683 --> 00:39:48,763</time>
<s>是有我的女朋友</s>
<time>1261_00:39:49,123 --> 00:39:49,843</time>
<s>有很多女朋友</s>
<time>1262_00:39:50,203 --> 00:39:51,643</time>
<s>我觉得她们这样</s>
<time>1263_00:39:52,003 --> 00:39:52,363</time>
<s>这种做人对吧</s>
<time>1264_00:39:52,723 --> 00:39:53,803</time>
<s>这种什么</s>
<time>1265_00:39:54,163 --> 00:39:55,963</time>
<s>然后再加上我对她们的一些</s>
<time>1266_00:39:56,313 --> 00:39:57,753</time>
<s>很善意的理解</s>
<time>1267_00:39:58,113 --> 00:39:59,553</time>
<s>然后再把她们虚构出来</s>
<time>1268_00:40:00,273 --> 00:40:00,633</time>
<s>就是女权的这个态度十！</s>
<time>1269_00:40:00,993 --> 00:40:02,433</time>
<s>就是女权的这个态度</s>
<time>1270_00:40:02,793 --> 00:40:04,953</time>
<s>就是男女是绝对对立的对吧</s>
<time>1271_00:40:05,313 --> 00:40:07,456</time>
<s>就是女权就是要</s>
<time>1272_00:40:09,256 --> 00:40:11,056</time>
<s>就是有一种敌对态度</s>
<time>1273_00:40:11,416 --> 00:40:13,576</time>
<s>实际上我的所有的主人公</s>
<time>1274_00:40:13,936 --> 00:40:16,455</time>
<s>跟我自己态度相像的就是说</s>
<time>1275_00:40:16,815 --> 00:40:17,895</time>
<s>我没把男性当成一个</s>
<time>1276_00:40:18,255 --> 00:40:18,975</time>
<s>敌人</s>
<time>1277_00:40:19,335 --> 00:40:20,775</time>
<s>就没有敌对的地方对吧</s>
<time>1278_00:40:21,495 --> 00:40:24,375</time>
<s>我就最最不喜欢的女人</s>
<time>1279_00:40:24,735 --> 00:40:25,455</time>
<s>就是特别计较</s>
<time>1280_00:40:25,815 --> 00:40:27,245</time>
<s>特别算计男人的你知道吗</s>
<time>1281_00:40:29,405 --> 00:40:31,925</time>
<s>也就最瞧不起的就是这种女人</s>
<time>1282_00:40:32,285 --> 00:40:34,085</time>
<s>就是把自己当花儿养着对吧</s>
<time>1283_00:40:34,445 --> 00:40:37,308</time>
<s>然后就是我的每一分美丽</s>
<time>1284_00:40:37,668 --> 00:40:39,828</time>
<s>都要榨取你多少价值的那个</s>
<time>1285_00:40:40,188 --> 00:40:40,908</time>
<s>就是这一种女人</s>
<time>1286_00:40:41,268 --> 00:40:41,988</time>
<s>我是最最瞧不起</s>
<time>1287_00:40:42,348 --> 00:40:43,788</time>
<s>女性作家跟男性作家</s>
