<time>550_00:28:28,977 --> 00:28:32,614</time>
<s>那种初恋显得人好像焕然一新</s>
<time>551_00:28:33,348 --> 00:28:34,449</time>
<s>在这个焕然一新里面</s>
<time>552_00:28:34,816 --> 00:28:36,618</time>
<s>他根本就没有把里面的那些困难</s>
<time>553_00:28:37,352 --> 00:28:37,719</time>
<s>那些压力</s>
<time>554_00:28:38,820 --> 00:28:39,521</time>
<s>那些艰难</s>
<time>555_00:28:40,255 --> 00:28:42,090</time>
<s>根本就没有想过</s>
<time>556_00:28:43,525 --> 00:28:46,094</time>
<s>所以那种启动很快的初恋往往很不靠谱</s>
<time>557_00:28:46,828 --> 00:28:50,098</time>
<s>没有把这些东西真正地在心理上把它消化一下</s>
<time>558_00:28:50,465 --> 00:28:52,634</time>
<s>伊芙琳后来跟弗兰克约好</s>
<time>559_00:28:53,001 --> 00:28:54,469</time>
<s>第二天早上灰蒙蒙的天</s>
<time>560_00:28:55,537 --> 00:28:56,271</time>
<s>两个人朝着码头跑了</s>
<time>561_00:28:57,005 --> 00:28:58,106</time>
<s>码头上人山人海</s>
<time>562_00:28:58,473 --> 00:28:59,908</time>
<s>弗兰克被人流冲到前面</s>
<time>563_00:29:00,275 --> 00:29:02,110</time>
<s>伊芙琳在后面一点点距离</s>
<time>564_00:29:02,477 --> 00:29:03,912</time>
<s>她要跨过一个栏杆就可以上船了</s>
<time>565_00:29:04,646 --> 00:29:05,747</time>
<s>结果没想到就在栏杆那个地方</s>
<time>566_00:29:06,114 --> 00:29:06,848</time>
<s>她扶着那个铁栅栏</s>
<time>567_00:29:07,916 --> 00:29:08,283</time>
<s>一步也迈不动</s>
<time>568_00:29:10,118 --> 00:29:11,553</time>
<s>这是有高度象征性的</s>
<time>569_00:29:12,287 --> 00:29:13,388</time>
<s>跨过这一步以后</s>
<time>570_00:29:14,122 --> 00:29:15,190</time>
<s>新的世界是完全不知道的</s>
<time>571_00:29:17,025 --> 00:29:18,126</time>
<s>而原来的生活尽管很差</s>
<time>572_00:29:18,860 --> 00:29:21,029</time>
<s>但是是可知的可预计的</s>
<time>573_00:29:22,130 --> 00:29:23,565</time>
<s>在某种意义上说也是可依赖的</s>
<time>574_00:29:25,400 --> 00:29:27,202</time>
<s>所以我们很多人就会在这个矣键口上</s>
<time>575_00:29:28,670 --> 00:29:29,404</time>
<s>宁可过那种</s>
<time>576_00:29:30,839 --> 00:29:33,041</time>
<s>在自己心里面落满灰尘的生活</s>
<time>577_00:29:34,142 --> 00:29:37,412</time>
<s>也不去打开有点惊心动魄的</s>
<time>578_00:29:38,847 --> 00:29:41,416</time>
<s>那种新的世界</s>
<time>579_00:29:42,851 --> 00:29:45,053</time>
<s>伊芙琳在那一刻非常绝挚</s>
<time>580_00:29:45,787 --> 00:29:47,222</time>
<s>她扶着栏杆看着弗兰克</s>
<time>581_00:29:47,956 --> 00:29:48,323</time>
<s>弗兰克回头看她</s>
<time>582_00:29:48,690 --> 00:29:49,791</time>
<s>说伊芙琳快来快来</s>
<time>583_00:29:50,525 --> 00:29:53,428</time>
<s>结果她看到伊芙琳的眼神里边</s>
<time>584_00:29:54,162 --> 00:29:55,597</time>
<s>没有什么惜别之意</s>
<time>585_00:29:57,065 --> 00:29:58,867</time>
<s>甚至也没有一丝爱恋的神色</s>
<time>586_00:29:59,968 --> 00:30:00,702</time>
<s>但是伊芙琳也明白了</s>
<time>587_00:30:02,170 --> 00:30:02,871</time>
<s>自己做不到</s>
<time>588_00:30:04,339 --> 00:30:05,440</time>
<s>这样一种向远方的生活</s>
<time>589_00:30:06,875 --> 00:30:09,444</time>
<s>因为以往的二十来年</s>
<time>590_00:30:09,811 --> 00:30:12,714</time>
<s>已经在内部把她的灵魂给消蚀掉了</s>
<time>591_00:30:13,815 --> 00:30:17,085</time>
<s>所以只有在脑子里的浅浅的一层愿挚</s>
<time>592_00:30:17,452 --> 00:30:18,887</time>
<s>使她要私奔</s>
<time>593_00:30:19,988 --> 00:30:21,089</time>
<s>但是真正行动的时候</s>
<time>594_00:30:21,456 --> 00:30:22,190</time>
<s>已经没有力量了</s>
<time>595_00:30:23,258 --> 00:30:25,093</time>
<s>而这正是我们今天很多人的状态</s>
<time>596_00:30:26,528 --> 00:30:29,097</time>
<s>我们很多人在谈爱情谈向往</s>
<time>597_00:30:30,899 --> 00:30:32,000</time>
<s>那不过就是谈谈而已</s>
<time>598_00:30:33,101 --> 00:30:34,169</time>
<s>真正要去动是动不了的</s>
<time>599_00:30:36,004 --> 00:30:37,472</time>
<s>真正要去动还是要找现实的</s>
<time>600_00:30:38,540 --> 00:30:40,008</time>
<s>还是要找车子房子</s>
<time>601_00:30:42,177 --> 00:30:42,911</time>
<s>这种情况太多了</s>
<time>602_00:30:43,645 --> 00:30:44,746</time>
<s>知道自己的极限</s>
<time>603_00:30:45,113 --> 00:30:46,181</time>
<s>如果知道的话</s>
<time>604_00:30:46,548 --> 00:30:48,016</time>
<s>内心深处也就很甘心了</s>
<time>605_00:30:49,484 --> 00:30:50,552</time>
<s>就建设一个小生活</s>
<time>606_00:30:51,286 --> 00:30:53,121</time>
<s>这也是一个非常</s>
<time>607_00:30:54,556 --> 00:30:56,758</time>
<s>让人感觉有点悲伤有点伤感</s>
<time>608_00:30:57,492 --> 00:30:58,927</time>
<s>但是可能在某个历史阶段</s>
<time>609_00:31:00,395 --> 00:31:02,564</time>
<s>普遍的可能就是这么一个状况</s>
<time>610_00:31:16,411 --> 00:31:17,512</time>
<s>还有就是在初恋里面</s>
<time>611_00:31:18,580 --> 00:31:19,681</time>
<s>那种分手</s>
<time>612_00:31:20,048 --> 00:31:21,850</time>
<s>有时候也不见得是坏事</s>
<time>613_00:31:22,584 --> 00:31:24,052</time>
<s>在初恋的放下里面</s>
<time>614_00:31:25,520 --> 00:31:26,955</time>
<s>有时候会打开一个新的世界</s>
<time>615_00:31:28,423 --> 00:31:29,858</time>
<s>有时候是因为看到了新的世界</s>
<time>616_00:31:30,592 --> 00:31:30,959</time>
<s>而放下了初恋</s>
<time>617_00:31:31,693 --> 00:31:32,060</time>
<s>英国作家</s>
<time>618_00:31:34,229 --> 00:31:36,798</time>
<s>福斯特写的《印度之旅》</s>
<time>619_00:31:37,165 --> 00:31:39,334</time>
<s>后来大卫·里恩把它改编成电影</s>
<time>620_00:31:40,068 --> 00:31:40,435</time>
<s>特别好</s>
<time>621_00:31:40,802 --> 00:31:42,237</time>
<s>奎斯特这个英国女孩子</s>
<time>622_00:31:42,604 --> 00:31:44,806</time>
<s>她到印度来是看她的未婚夫</s>
<time>623_00:31:46,608 --> 00:31:48,443</time>
<s>这个未婚夫在英国的殖民社会里面</s>
<time>624_00:31:48,810 --> 00:31:49,878</time>
<s>是个特别标准的好青年</s>
<time>625_00:31:50,612 --> 00:31:50,979</time>
<s>忠于职守</s>
<time>626_00:31:51,713 --> 00:31:53,882</time>
<s>看上去觉得这个人</s>
<time>627_00:31:54,616 --> 00:31:54,983</time>
<s>又英俊</s>
<time>628_00:31:55,350 --> 00:31:56,818</time>
<s>是个非常好的结婚对象</s>
<time>629_00:31:58,253 --> 00:31:58,987</time>
<s>但是到了印度之后</s>
<time>630_00:31:59,354 --> 00:32:03,358</time>
<s>她先去看了那些充满性爱雕塑的神庙</s>
<time>631_00:32:04,092 --> 00:32:04,826</time>
<s>那种原始意象</s>
<time>632_00:32:05,193 --> 00:32:05,527</time>
<s>后来到了山上</s>
<time>633_00:32:05,894 --> 00:32:08,096</time>
<s>进了那种原始的山洞里面</s>
<time>634_00:32:08,463 --> 00:32:09,531</time>
<s>忽然感受到一种震撼</s>
<time>635_00:32:12,100 --> 00:32:13,535</time>
<s>脑子里面的一片清除感</s>
<time>636_00:32:14,636 --> 00:32:17,906</time>
<s>原来的那种固有的白人社会建立起来的那套东西</s>
<time>637_00:32:18,273 --> 00:32:20,108</time>
<s>都在那种震撼里面消失掉了</s>
<time>638_00:32:20,842 --> 00:32:21,543</time>
<s>她就不知道自己是谁了</s>
<time>639_00:32:21,910 --> 00:32:23,011</time>
<s>她回挚这个山的时候</s>
<time>640_00:32:23,378 --> 00:32:25,914</time>
<s>看到那么多英国人对印度本土人的歧视</s>
<time>641_00:32:26,648 --> 00:32:27,749</time>
<s>她深深地感到痛苦</s>
<time>642_00:32:28,483 --> 00:32:29,551</time>
<s>所以在回挚这个城市的时候</s>
<time>643_00:32:29,918 --> 00:32:30,652</time>
<s>忽然她一下子</s>
<time>644_00:32:32,487 --> 00:32:32,854</time>
<s>明白</s>
<time>645_00:32:33,555 --> 00:32:34,289</time>
<s>她那一刻</s>
<time>646_00:32:35,390 --> 00:32:37,926</time>
<s>她发现自己己经不爱自己的未婚夫了</s>
<time>647_00:32:39,027 --> 00:32:40,495</time>
<s>所以正因为有这公一个不爱</s>
<time>648_00:32:40,862 --> 00:32:43,398</time>
<s>最后她跟原来的生活做了一个告别</s>
<time>649_00:32:44,866 --> 00:32:47,768</time>
<s>最后那个印度医生被诬告的时候</s>
<time>650_00:32:48,135 --> 00:32:51,038</time>
<s>她终于能够站出来为他洗清</s>
<time>651_00:32:52,139 --> 00:32:53,574</time>
<s>站在了整个白人社会的对立面</s>
<time>652_00:32:54,308 --> 00:32:55,409</time>
<s>放下初恋的时候</s>
<time>653_00:32:56,510 --> 00:32:57,945</time>
<s>其实有时候是我们</s>
<time>654_00:32:58,679 --> 00:33:01,582</time>
<s>对世界的一个重新的打开</s>
<time>655_00:33:02,683 --> 00:33:05,219</time>
<s>是对我们在这个世界上的一个重新的认识</s>
<time>656_00:33:05,953 --> 00:33:09,223</time>
<s>尤其我们中国现在目前处在一个转型社会</s>
<time>657_00:33:09,957 --> 00:33:11,058</time>
<s>变化速度越来越快</s>
<time>658_00:33:11,425 --> 00:33:12,159</time>
<s>以我们今天的角度</s>
<time>659_00:33:12,860 --> 00:33:14,328</time>
<s>我们根本就无法预测五年以后的生活</s>
<time>660_00:33:15,429 --> 00:33:16,530</time>
<s>所以在这个过程里面</s>
<time>661_00:33:17,231 --> 00:33:17,965</time>
<s>你的有些初恋</s>
<time>662_00:33:19,433 --> 00:33:22,336</time>
<s>可能是在未来的生活里面</s>
<time>663_00:33:23,437 --> 00:33:25,606</time>
<s>它肯定是会被放弃的</s>
<time>664_00:33:26,340 --> 00:33:27,441</time>
<s>所以从总的来说</s>
<time>665_00:33:28,509 --> 00:33:31,445</time>
<s>初恋和分手这么一个矢系里面</s>
<time>666_00:33:32,179 --> 00:33:34,715</time>
<s>其实有很多很多复杂的内容</s>
<time>667_00:33:35,449 --> 00:33:36,517</time>
<s>对我们中国人来说</s>
<time>668_00:33:36,884 --> 00:33:38,719</time>
<s>这个问题对我们来说是压力比较大的</s>
<time>669_00:33:39,820 --> 00:33:40,521</time>
<s>因为我们中国人</s>
<time>670_00:33:41,255 --> 00:33:43,090</time>
<s>在几十年前我们还是一个农业社会</s>
<time>671_00:33:44,191 --> 00:33:45,993</time>
<s>所以人只在一个单一性里生活</s>
<time>672_00:33:47,094 --> 00:33:48,195</time>
<s>所以那个社会里面我们认定</s>
<time>673_00:33:49,630 --> 00:33:52,900</time>
<s>一种情感的轨道</s>
<time>674_00:33:54,001 --> 00:33:55,102</time>
<s>就是从头到尾</s>
<time>675_00:33:56,537 --> 00:33:56,904</time>
<s>白头到老</s>
<time>676_00:33:58,005 --> 00:33:59,106</time>
<s>这样一种观念</s>
<time>677_00:33:59,840 --> 00:34:02,743</time>
<s>然后我们在生活里面不光是情感</s>
<time>678_00:34:03,110 --> 00:34:05,279</time>
<s>其实我们整个的生活也是一元化的</s>
<time>679_00:34:06,013 --> 00:34:07,114</time>
<s>除了种地还是种地</s>
<time>680_00:34:07,848 --> 00:34:09,283</time>
<s>但我们今天就完全不一样了</s>
<time>681_00:34:10,751 --> 00:34:11,485</time>
<s>就完全不一样</s>
<time>682_00:34:11,852 --> 00:34:12,920</time>
<s>我们今天在你这个生活之外</s>
<time>683_00:34:13,287 --> 00:34:14,021</time>
<s>还有别的生活</s>
<time>684_00:34:14,755 --> 00:34:16,557</time>
<s>什么叫远方什么叫生活到别处</s>
<time>685_00:34:17,291 --> 00:34:19,126</time>
<s>今天我们在地域上是大大地拓展了</s>
<time>686_00:34:19,493 --> 00:34:20,194</time>
<s>拓展以后</s>
<time>687_00:34:20,928 --> 00:34:23,130</time>
<s>你的初恋和你的分手</s>
<time>688_00:34:24,198 --> 00:34:25,666</time>
<s>放在新的历史语境里面</s>
<time>689_00:34:26,767 --> 00:34:27,835</time>
<s>它的意义变化了</s>
<time>690_00:34:28,936 --> 00:34:29,670</time>
<s>价值也变化了</s>
<time>691_00:34:30,404 --> 00:34:32,573</time>
<s>所以我们一方面要特别珍惜初恋</s>
<time>692_00:34:33,307 --> 00:34:34,775</time>
<s>另一方面我们要特别珍惜分手</s>
<time>693_00:34:35,509 --> 00:34:36,210</time>
<s>都是你的延伸点</s>
<time>694_00:34:39,847 --> 00:34:41,682</time>
<s>所以不再把它作为一个</s>
<time>695_00:34:42,416 --> 00:34:45,686</time>
<s>我觉得不适合把分手作为一个特别悲情的东西</s>
<time>696_00:34:46,420 --> 00:34:48,222</time>
<s>比如说分手就是特别悲情</s>
<time>697_00:34:48,956 --> 00:34:49,323</time>
<s>不一定</s>
<time>698_00:34:50,424 --> 00:34:51,859</time>
<s>然后初恋</s>
<time>699_00:34:52,960 --> 00:34:55,162</time>
<s>当然在我们今天的社会里面</s>
<time>700_00:34:57,331 --> 00:34:58,065</time>
<s>在某种意义上说</s>
<time>701_00:34:58,799 --> 00:35:00,601</time>
<s>有的初恋对你来说可能是一个悲剧</s>
<time>702_00:35:02,436 --> 00:35:04,605</time>
<s>有的初恋对你来说可能是一个永恒</s>
<time>703_00:35:06,073 --> 00:35:06,807</time>
<s>都不一样</s>
<time>704_00:35:08,609 --> 00:35:10,811</time>
<s>希望大家能有一个新的认识</s>
<time>705_00:35:11,879 --> 00:35:15,182</time>
<s>第一部分就给大家讲到这里</s>
